Standing On My Soap Box

11:50 AM Posted In , , Edit This 0 Comments »
I don't typically talk politics, not on this blog and not in day to day conversation. It's something I don't like talking about, not that it doesn't interest me, but I don't like expressing my political opinion. But there is something I need to get out, it eats away at me every time I read the headlines. A government run health care system.

Yes, in theory, it sounds marvelous! Health care for everyone? Really? Oh it's just amazing! But seriously people, this can't work. First of all, it's not like this health care plan is going to kick in for a while, 2013 at the absolute earliest. Guess what though, we get to pay taxes on this future health care plan, possibly starting in 2010. So for three years we get to pay taxes on something that isn't actually helping us at the present time. In this grand recession where people are losing jobs left and right, when everyone seems to know someone who is unemployed, our taxes are going to be raised. Those of us who are fortunate enough to have health insurance will not only be paying for their current policy, but for an additional one through taxes. Here's another surprise, there is no guarantee a government run health care system will actually happen. It doesn't matter if you pay the taxes, there is still a chance it won't work out. All of that tax money will be gone, never to be seen again.

But let's believe for a moment that we willingly pay the taxes and the bill passes and takes effect. It doesn't matter if every person is taxed to the max, there simply isn't enough money for everyone to have health care. It's sad but it is also true. We are a nation who is debt because of frivolous spending and no one wants to take responsibility. How are we supposed to afford health care for all? It isn't possible so that is why there will be short cuts. You think it takes long enough now to see a specialist? Sometimes it takes up to six months to get in with a practice. Imagine how long it will take if the government runs our health care system? Furthermore, the government will decide if you even get to see a specialist.

Oh your heart is feeling a little off kilter? No you don't need a cardiologist and an EKG, you need your happy ER doctor to tell you that you just need to change your lifestyle. Never mind your heart is skipping beats, beating out of your chest, leaving you breathless, and causing you excruciating pain. You don't need to go to three cardiologists and have them all scratch their heads because they don't know what's wrong. You don't need an appointment with a cardiac electrophysiologist to figure out you have an extremely rare, dangerous in certain situations, and possibly fatal heart condition. You don't need any of that, what you need is to change your life style. That's exactly what is going to happen with government run health care. You won't get to see a specialist when you need to, you won't get the proper tests run, you're only going to get a half way excuse about why you feel the way you do.

Now this goes out especially to all of my chronically ill readers. Have you ever heard of end of life counseling? In this health care bill, it primarily applies to senior citizens whose health is declining. Every five years you will be counseled on how to live, or not live, the remaining time of your life. The focus isn't on getting you better, making you healthier so you can have a few more good years. It's about pain management and possibly teaching you the options on how to end your life sooner.

Cruel isn't it? But everyone wants free health care, right? That is part of how this program works, you get free health care while you are healthy. You're allowed the occasional case of the sniffles, a flu every now and again. God forbid you are diagnosed with a debilitating chronic illness, or an illness that is potentially deadly without proper treatment. I feel the end of life counseling will also extend to the chronically ill. The government is essentially saying "You're not as healthy as the rest of the general population, therefore you are disposable, good bye." That is how they will save money so they can attempt to provide some sort of health care to everyone else. The weak die off and the strong survive.

I admit, I voted for President Obama. I wasn't one of the "Yes, we can!" people. I was on the fence about who to vote for until I went to the polls. And now every single day I regret ever voting for him. It's because my life hangs on by a thread if this health care bill he proposed passes. I understand that lots of people don't have insurance, I might end up being one of them. But this government run health care system is not the way to go. Heck, let the people who have insurance keep their insurance. Let the government give out vouchers, create a tiered insurance policy that anyone can purchase. But don't fall for this health care plan that the government is proposing. It seems fine and dandy to those who are healthy. For someone like me though, I might as well dig my grave and hop in because I will not survive under this new plan.

I urge you to write to your representative, tell them that you are a voter, and explain your concerns. If change is what our nation needs, let it be the right type. Let it be the type that won't leave people like me out in the cold. Let it be the type that won't encourage your grandparents to give up their life. Let the change be something that allows us to live and say that we are not disposable, we are individuals, and we deserve more than this!

Here you can look up your representative using your state and zip code.

Bisous!
Erika

A Little Slip Of Hope

7:10 PM Posted In , , Edit This 0 Comments »
Over the weekend, a really good friend of mine bought be a present. I didn't know what to expect when I was told I was getting one. So I was surprised when I was handed a small slip of paper. When I looked to see what it was, I saw it was a lottery ticket. A mega millions ticket where the estimated jackpot is $94,000,000. You're probably thinking big deal? Right? Well, you're wrong.

This lottery ticket expresses hope to me. Realistically I know that I have a snow ball's chance in hell of winning. I know that I don't deserve to win that much money either. But to me, this lottery ticket gives me a little bit hope. I have a little slip of paper that could possibly change my life. I have a chance that might enable me to make my dreams and the dreams of others come true. It may be a minuscule chance, but a little something has to be better than nothing?

You know what means more to me than the chance of winning? Yesterday was my first day of expressing how I truly felt. I was honest, raw, emotional, I was every thing I wanted to be! I was given this ticket on my first day of being me. It almost felt as if it said "Congratulations on making it through your first day. For just being you." This ticket gives me hope, it shows me that even though the odds are against me, I could just win. The odds are against me in most aspects of my life but there is a chance that something, somewhere is going to give. That I will win a battle!

I'm already winning a battle too. I'm fighting against being so unemotional all the time. I'm fighting against not being who everyone wants me to be. It's difficult not throwing on a fake smile or hiding how I really feel. Right now though, I'm dead dog tired, it's been a long and emotional past few days. But I feel I've made a lot of breakthroughs. I have reached inside myself and in a way that has helped me to reach out with others.

Me and my little lottery ticket of hope are going to hope. We're going to hope that my life changes, whether or not I win. We're going to hope that I am able to consistently make changes that positively impact me first of all, others second. I've put other people's needs in front of mine for so long now it has caused damage. It is time for that to change, the change is coming for me. I'm not going to be the same girl who I was last week. And next week I am not going to be the same girl who I am this week. I am going to change, evolve, and become the woman I want to be.

I also never thought of the 28th of a month as a particularly lucky number, but now I do. I just remembered the reason why I think my Grandpa waited until April 28th to die. April 27th is my half birthday and he was the one who celebrated it with me. I would get a little card or a phone call wishing me a happy half Birthday. It was our little thing, our little secret that no one else cared about. And even though he couldn't call to wish me a happy 18 1/2 birthday, he stayed alive for it. He waited until early in the morning of the 28th to die. I honestly think he knew how much it meant to me. Even though I couldn't be there with him in his final hours, he knew. I don't think he could let himself die on our secret day. And on my lottery ticket, the first number is 28. It feels like a sign to me.

I'm going to save this lottery ticket no matter what.

Bisous!
Erika