But I Can Do This Instead

7:11 PM Posted In , , Edit This 3 Comments »
Often times when faced with a chronic illness you have to make choices. You choose which is more important, to go outside and get the paper or to pour yourself a bowl of cereal. You choose whether doing your hair is more important than putting on makeup or shaving your face. You choose whether or not to go from business to business dropping off applications or to sit at home and fax. Every day is filled with what feels like hundreds of choices. And most of the time when you have a chronic illness that depletes your energy, zaps your strength, and makes you feel like you can barely put one foot in front of the other, you choose the easy way. It's easier to pour a bowl of cereal, to brush your hair (unless you have my hair which breaks combs), and to fax resumes. I wake up with a limited amount of energy and strength and in order to make it last the whole day I have to make choices.

But I have figured out that life isn't about what I can't do, it's about what I can do. What are the things I can do you are asking? I decided to make a list and I'm asking you to do the same. You'll soon see why.
  1. I can get out of bed.
  2. I can put on my glasses.
  3. I can check my email and social networking sites.
  4. I can go down the stairs.
  5. I can make grits.
  6. I can make tea.
  7. I can go back up the stairs.
  8. I can watch the news.
  9. I can brush my teeth.
  10. I can grab the phone.
  11. I can research jobs online.
  12. I can call businesses.
  13. I can type on my laptop which ones are hiring.
  14. I can go downstairs.
  15. I can fax resumes.
  16. I can go back upstairs.
  17. I can clean my desk space.
  18. I can make my bed.
  19. I can take a shower.
  20. I can comb my hair.
  21. I can go downstairs.
  22. I can get a bottle of water out of the refrigerator.
  23. I can go back upstairs.
  24. I can drink my water.
  25. I can research jobs online again.
  26. I can call businesses again.
  27. I can type down on my laptop which ones are hiring again.
  28. I can go downstairs.
  29. I can fax resumes.
  30. I can wash my hands.
  31. I can put my lunch in the microwave.
  32. I can get my lunch out of the microwave.
  33. I can go upstairs.
  34. I can eat lunch.
  35. I can go brush my teeth.
  36. I can go downstairs.
  37. I can go out the door.
  38. I can lock the door.
  39. I can go on a walk (1-2 miles!).
  40. I can go in the door.
  41. I can lock the door.
  42. I can go upstairs.
  43. I can nap.
  44. I can lay in bed.
  45. I can watch the news.
  46. I can talk to my friends online.
  47. I can type my blog (exciting).
  48. I can talk to my Mom when she gets home.
  49. I can plan the next day.
  50. I can go into the other room!
  51. I can get out my art supplies (watercolors, yay!).
  52. I can go back into my room carrying my art supplies.
  53. I can paint.
  54. I can carry my art supplies to the other room.
  55. I can put them away.
  56. I can go back to my room.
  57. I can put my laptop, remote, and other needed electronics on my bed.
  58. I can get into bed.
  59. I can take my pills.
  60. I can watch TV.
  61. I can go downstairs.
  62. I can fix my rice cakes with homemade sugar free hazelnut spread and peanut butter.
  63. I can go back upstairs.
  64. I can eat my snack.
  65. I can brush my teeth (can you tell yet that I have impeccable oral hygiene, I floss and mouthwash too).
  66. I can go back in my room.
  67. I can get under the covers in my bed.
  68. I can take off my glasses.
  69. I can turn off my lamp.
  70. I can watch TV.
  71. I can go to sleep.
I can do 71 things in one day! Now to the average person, that doesn't seem like a lot. But to me, it takes a lot of work to get those 71 things done. And I'm proud of myself for being able to do those things. I'm hoping in the future, with strength, with energy, with better medications (hint hint happy scientists and pharmaceutical companies) I can do more things. Maybe in a month from now I will be up to 100 things? Possibly six months from now I could do 200 things? And there is hope that in a year from now I will be a crazy perfectionist multi-tasker who is saving the world!

So instead of thinking of all the things you can't do, think about what you can do. You can be a good person just by being you! Send someone a nice email if you are able to. Pick up the phone for a conversation or two if your voice will allow. Think of all the wonderful things you can do from home if leaving the house is a hassle. Be a smiling face to those who surround you. Be a source of strength and encouragement to those who need it. Give life your all, even if it's only ten things a day. If you do those ten things to the best of your ability, you are giving back. You are giving back to yourself and to those around you. That's what counts, you're sharing your gift of life. Remember, the next the time you're feeling down thinking "I can't do this." Think to yourself "But I can do this instead!"

In other news, I have a sort of second job interview tomorrow. I had a phone interview on Tuesday afternoon and it went really well. I go in tomorrow afternoon for "registration paperwork" and to meet the doctor. I hope it's not a long meet and greet with the doctor, I just hope he likes me. If he likes me, then there is a better chance I will be hired. Again, hope, pray, jump backwards, do what you got to do to make things work! I need this job and I'm beginning to feel quite nervous about it. But I can do this, I know I can! If anyone has any advice, let me know! It's a medical receptionist job if I haven't told you already:-)

Bisous!
Erika

3 comments:

RA Guy said...

You forgot #72: Made a list of the 71 things I did.

I like this and it's very encouraging, at times I get caught up on what I can't do instead of focusing on what I can do.

Loverly Lupie Me said...

I counted making the list in with writing the blog:-P

I'm glad you find it encouraging. It was harder than I thought it was to go through my day and list everything that I did.

Cynthia said...

Thinking of what I can do gave me a real boost. I need to think in a positive light. This was definitely an uplifting blog.
Mom